Terry Mosher 3

TERRY MOSHER

 

I’m sure you realize there is a cottage industry out there in cyberspace. Sure you do. There are enough scam artists working the Internet to fill up all of Google’s companies, and Google is acquiring them by the bushel basket.

It occurs to me that the cyber robbers must know who is ripe for a scam. I would guess their favorite target is the elder, which fits my description because I seem to get about a dozen a day. I should have been keeping track of them for my amusement instead of hitting the delete button.

Two I just got was these: Western Union Moneygram, The FBI and Wells Fargo, security update. These two and all the rest of them try to lure you to give them your personal information and once they have that they have your finances within their grasp.

They don’t know this, but unfortunately for them I don’t have any finances to lose to them. Just the same, I’m not dumb enough – not yet anyway – to give them my personal information.

I say not yet anyway because once I start losing my mine (some people feel I have already lost my mind) then all bets are off. Maybe in a few more years my mind will have wandered into la-la land and I will not question these scams and get sucked in and lose what I do have, which isn’t much.

For now, though, it’s just an inconvenience, although I could amuse myself by logging from here on out how many millions of dollars and pounds (because some of the scams are British) I have acquired through winning a lottery or just from some loving individual deciding I needed some financial help and named me in their will.

It’s only a guess, but I have probably turned down hundreds of millions of dollars in the past year.  If I would have acted upon these loving donors acts toward me I probably could have built a Mosher Tower in downtown Bremerton that would have rivaled the Trump Tower.

Fortunately, I’m not into the Trump ego game. I have just enough ego to survive in our competitive world, and that is about it. I’m not into being a braggart. In fact, I don’t know how I have managed to be a public writer through my writing because I don’t like to be in the public. I get nervous when there are more than two people in a room, including when our family every so often gathers for a barbeque. And I’d almost rather be in front of a firing squad than be faced with a speaking engagement before a crowd.

I’ll tell you what, though, if I could speak I would make more sense than most of the idiots running for president. That would include especially the Donald.

As it is, the scammers believe I’m an idiot. Somebody wants to make me an oil and gas proposal which I assume will make me millions by just signing over my personal information.

This other one wants me to send a copy of my passport to him. He is the director of operations for the Ghana National Petroleum Corporation and is asking me to share a 60/40 percent of $25 million to help him retire from active service and relocate to invest this amount.

Why, sure, I’ll send you right away my passport, and thanks for helping me out. I don’t know how dumb this scammer think I am, but it has to be up there right alongside of, say, the Trumpster.  I know I can’t wait for the next scam. I’ll be all in for sure.

Well, not quite. The latest one wants me to reimburse them for paying to stop my Visa card from expiring. If I don’t pay them the $5.6 million on the card will revert to the federal government instead of going to me.  Of course, they also want a copy of my ID card.

The other new one today is a notice that my email address has won the freelotto worth $2 million. I have to keep it quiet for security reasons and, of course, provide them all the proper personal information.

So just in the past two days I have won at least $17.6 million. At this rate, I’ll catch the Trumpster before the year is out and pass Hillary and Bill probably in early November. I’m going to be so rich I may decide to throw my hat into the presidential race so I can make some more easy money.

Life is so much fun when you can sit back and watch the money roll in. Why didn’t we have the Internet when I was much younger? I can only dream of how much I would be worth now if we did have it around. Maybe I could be close to what Trump says he’s worth. That, of course, would be great, just as Trump says everything is great. He’s great, he has great ideas, he will make this country great again and, of course, he will get richer, which will be great for him.

You do realize, don’t you, that the greatest scam going on right now is not being played out on the Internet?

No, it’s being played out on the presidential campaign trail by the Trumpster. He’s the biggest scam artist there is. He would have been perfect for Ringing Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus and their Greatest Show on Earth.

When the Trumpster speaks I hear the carnival barker say, “Step right up and see the fat lady with the mustache. Right this way, folks. Only $2.50 and you get to see the biggest freak show on Earth, but you must hurry the next show starts in two minutes.”

Well, I’ve got to go. I have to get to the bank and deposit my latest shipment of American dollars that arrived by UPS. Take care, and I bet you wish you were as important as me on the Internet.

Until we meet again.

Be well pal.

Be careful out there.

Have a great day.

You are loved.